I'm going to stab you in the eye..

... has become my new favourite catchphrase. Much like myself it is both charming and witty.

Observe:

Nic: I don't like McFly

Me: I'm going to stab you in the eye

Step Dad: You are downloading too much and it's making us go over the BT limit which is costing us money

Me: I'm going to stab you in the eye

Coffee Barrista: I'm afraid this coupon for a free coffee expired two days ago

Me: I'm going to stab you in the eye

Police Officer: You have to stop threatening people with violence or there will charges brought against you. In particular, the young lady that works in Costa's is considering sueing you for damages.

Me: I'm going to stab you in the eye

See, it works in a number of different situations and has the added bonus of making you appear to be some sort of modern day Oscar Wilde with a gift for snappy putdowns. Doesnt it? (It does).