First eye-stabbing victim of the week

Last night I stayed up later than I have in a while finishing off an essay. When I say 'finishing off an essay' I mean I faffed about looking at different websites and talking to my brother on MSN (choice quote: Me: 'I don't know how to end this piece of shit essay', Brother: 'How about - "So in summary, it was all a bit of a lol"') and watched the latest episode of Never Mind the Buzzcocks online (sidenote: Amy 'Wino' Winehouse kicks ass. She is so funny and sassy and you know I love me some sass). (Further sidenote: Chloe reckons that Amy Wino looks like a cross between me and our housemate Marianna, I can tell you now that if Marianna and I ever DID breed then that would be the coolest fucking kid E-V-E-R. But it's unlikely to happen as my life is not an ill-conceived Arnold Swartzenegger vehicle co-starring Danny DeVito and Emma Thompson). (Sadly). So anyway, there was a point to this OH YES... I stayed up uber late basically faffing (faffing and procrastination are the two things in life that I really excel at. I am trying to think of a job that requires both of these skills but draw a blank everytime as, in all honesty, most bosses just want to get on with doing the actual fucking job they've hired you for and not spending as much time as possible writing out a to-do list of all the things you are meant to be doing and colour coordinating that with miniture post-its that correspond to your folders). (For example) all because I thought I was going to get to have a lovely long sleepy today till the afternoon. Because that's when the gas man was coming to fix our crumbling house of mank's heating. I checked it. I know I'm crap with time but I checked. The gas man said he would be coming on Monday afternoon. I know that because I was slightly upset that I might not be at the library at the time on a Monday when I have seen my crush on the past two Monday's. I asked if anyone else if the house was going to be in on Monday afternoon so I could go to the library and maybe speak to my crush again ALL BECAUSE THE GAS MAN SAID HE WOULD BE HERE ON MONDAY AFTERNOON. I KNOW HE SAID IT I CHECKED IT ON THE PIECE OF PAPER HE GAVE ME THAT SAID HE WOULD NEXT BE HERE ON MONDAY AFTERNOON.

You catch my drift.

Guess what time the gas man turns up?

10am.

Am I happy?

No.