It's fun to rhyme

Just cos you like Adam Rickett doesnt make you good at cricket.

Just cos you like Paul O'Grady doesnt make you the new slim shady

Just cos you like Julian Clary doesnt mean you can be so lary.

See?

Strangers who met on the way

The on hold music they play on my conferance call before it starts sounds like the theme tune from Moonlighting. Theres nothing like a bit of lite-jazz to make your Friday morning get off to a flying start.

The new 118 adverts have gone some way in my mind to making up for the absolutely dire '118 Sponsers E4 drama' promos that are so utturly rubbish that even I don't find them funny (are they sposed to be funny? I *think* they are) AND I LAUGH AT THE ORANGE ADVERTS IN THE CINEMA so it's pretty clear my sense of humour standards are not that high. My main beef with them is that they make men with moustaches look bad. As I think we all know, men with moustaches are pretty much the be all and end all of all things amazing and cool (c.f. Tom Selleck and Burt Reynolds).

I watched four minutes 23 seconds worth of Hollyoaks the other day. Two chavvy girls shouted at each other for a bit and then had an unconvincing school yard 'rumble'. I want that four minutes 23 seconds of my life back :(

Words I don't like to see or hear

- Moist

- Ointment

- And up next... Duncan from Blue

Suddenly you find you're out there, walking in a storm

I just spent nearly an hour playing solitaire. Not even Spider Solitaire, just the regular kind. I think I've got OCD combined with procrastinationitus. I couldn't stop playing until I had completed three games in a row, then it was three games in a row under 100 seconds and so on, etc, ad infinitum. All this in a effort to avoid doing my dissertation proposals which have to be in by March 17th. Oh March the 17th I grinned to myself, when we were given the deadline, why that is indeed a whole yonk away. I even chuckled a bit. Not so much as to get the old shoulder shaking action going, but just enough as to make it clear to those around me that I did laugh in the face of deadlines and they would just have to accept that. It's who I am, it's what I do. Very much like a modern day Fonz in that respect.

However now we find ourselves on this day, the 8th of the month and it seems to be getting a little close to the wire (espeically for a little social butterfly like myself). It also doesn't help that I spend an inordinate amount of time on MSN having conversations about how the little brother in Clarissa Explains It All was a concoction of Ron Howard and Carlton from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Unconvinced?

Observe:

Ron Howard

+ Carlton

= FERGUSON

Now thats what I'm talkin' 'bout.

I have developed an obsession with Neil Diamond. I've always liked him but I spent another hour yesterday looking for Neil Diamond tee shirts in an effort to prove my devotion. Neil Diamond love and having panic attacks when a deadline is a week away might lead one to the conclusion that maybe I'm not really like a modern day Fonz after all. :(

Points to mull over

Good god. When will that Mr Sweaty Potato Head on Neighbours die? Susan always looks really uncomfortable when they are kissing leading me to believe that the actor who plays him is a sly old fox and always tries to slip her the tongue. Basically I want him dead asap.

These things are vitally important to write about when you are trying to avoid doing your dissertation proposals.

Also distracting me this evening:

- My step-dads new goatee. He looks like David Brent and/or Toadfish. I havent decided if this is a 'good thing'

- Thinking about what I am going to wear to 80's night at Camden Underworld (do I go the whole hog and dress like one of the girls from Robots in Disguise?). Planning outfits is one of the greatest pleasures I have after black coffee.

- Making fake dates with MSN buddies to:

a) Go and play Jenga and have milk drinking competitions on a BP garage forecourt

b) Going to a jazz club and pretending to be Chachi and Jonie. Even though Jonie was an annoying twat.

- Also Pete sending me jokes about cows. I've forgotten it already. Doh.